
When we were making our decision about moving out of Dallas, I remember one of the categories on the mental spreadsheet was the high level of consumerism so prevalent in that glitzy city. Perhaps it was growing up in the 60s and 70s and then going to college in hippy dippy Austin that stunted my consumer gene but all that shopping for the latest and greatest thing just never appealed to me. And my husband, having been raised on a farm, never mainstreamed into big city buying either. So moving out of the city where it wasn’t just about what you drove, but how long it was (think mondo Suburbans) was something of a no brainer as far as the car column of the spreadsheet was concerned. We’re the types that would drive a car into the ground. Rural Colorado is just the place for people like us.
In our town, there appear to be two kinds of car owners. The first are in the category that we will most likely fall into – their cars are at least 10 years old and have bumper stickers professing their beliefs plastered all over the back. Things like “Keep your laws off my body” and “So many prairie dogs, so few recipes”. This kind of car makes sense up here because, for some reason, people that live in the country do not believe in garages. We do not have one and, being from the aforementioned car-as-extension-of-self city, we were fairly horrified and immediately started planning the construction. Another great thing about this brand of car is that there is only one carwash in town and it is the do it yourself kind. Which can get downright uncomfortable very quickly at this high, cool elevation. When you’re driving a car held together by duck tape and baling wire, what’s a little dirt?
Now the second kind of car owner is the type we aspire to be. You can hear them coming before you see them because of their gravelly, rumbling diesels. These are the landed gentry so to speak. They drive the big king cab trucks and Suburbans which they need to pull their horse trailers. The nicer your horse trailer, the higher your status. Those trucks also come in handy for driving around your acreage, checking fences and whatnot. Yessir, someday when I have acreage, I’m going to buy the noisiest diesel truck on the market. And the rattliest horse trailer (just in case you don’t hear my diesel when I pull into town).
My husband, being in his 40s, had to have his midlife-crisis car purchase. City folk go for racy things with Italian or German names. But here it's not how many gears, but plain-old four-wheel drive that matters. Before our purchase, we overheard someone complaining about having to drive behind a Texan with two-wheel drive. As we were the only ones in town as far as I could tell with Texas plates, I sunk a bit into my collar. So my husband jumped at the chance to buy a 75 Bronco. Never mind that it can't really go over 30 miles and hour and it eats more gas than aforementioned mondo Suburbans. It came with bumper stickers! "Broncoholic" and "Jerry Jeff Walker" right on the back fender. So now, we have joined the ranks of country folk that must have at least one more car in their yard than they have drivers. I guess you'd call it country consumerism. For us, it's our economical car, our high-occupancy car and our drive-over-anything car. I dare the Big Three to come up with just one that can do all that!
One more funny thing I noticed right away is that up here you NEVER hear the “breep breep” of someone activating their car alarm. Except for in the summer when all the tourists come to town. Of course, that’s not hard to figure as half the cars driven up here were built before alarms were on the drawing boards. But also because people trust each other. Or know eachother, so it's tougher to get away with crime. It is always with great reluctance that I push that little button on the key fob. Now, I don’t do it at home and I don’t do it if my car is empty (with the exception of all the junk that accumulates behind the front seat which anyone is more than welcome to cart away). But sometimes I run into the grocery store and leave my laptop – my life! – in the car. Its even more embarrassing when you do it in the dead of winter when every other unoccupied car in the parking lot is running. Still, you never know when some shifty non-local might park next to you. Better embarrassed than sorry. photo copyright Jan Lee 2009

